The Random Rants of a Melodramatic and Musical Teenage Teenager

Tue, 24 Feb 2009 18:41:13 GMT

This is an old userpic and I just thought what the heLl, why not, and I am now making this totally pointless post. ^_^ Another thing, does anyone other than me vlog? Or am I the only loser? xD

Every morning I wake up With a purpose and a smirk

Mon, 23 Feb 2009 18:21:34 GMT

So, I just uploaded a new userpic. :D The spektacular Regina Spektor, o'course. She so pretty, is no fair. D': AnyVay, everyday is so DULL. ;-; It makes me sad to know that every single day is JUST like the previous, and JUST like the next. I'm certain that tomorrow will be just like today, and that's why I haven't really written anything worthwhile. There's been nothing to really write. =/ Which sucks. I mean, I should be thankful that nothing tragic is going on, but I want something to happen. Good thing for the ~~awesome~~ Spektacular Regina who tried to save a pigeon with a broken wing and brings happiness to each day. :] <3 I want to see her in concert!!!!!!!!!1!

Writer's Block: Animal Instinct

Wed, 18 Feb 2009 18:39:47 GMT

What creature would you choose as your spirit animal?

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Most likely a wolf. Strong, independent, somewhat of a loner, and has quite a bit of a temper that can make or break you. I am/would like to be like that as I get older.

Writer's Block: Dream Trip

Wed, 18 Feb 2009 18:34:53 GMT

If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?

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Italy. Cuba. France. Germany. England. Scotland. New Zealand. Japan. India. Indonesia. Spain. CANADA.

The free iPersonic Personality Test

Thu, 12 Feb 2009 21:24:07 GMT

Blech

Tue, 10 Feb 2009 18:21:22 GMT

so, today was the FCAT Writes. AKA basically an essay sent to Tallahassee to be scored professionally. And, of course, I failed. Guaranteed. My essay was dull and outrageously boring. I hated it. I hated writing it! -________- Ugh. Not looking forward to April or whenever the hell those results come back.

I've been semi-mega stressing about high school rejection letters. [Notice how I say REJECTION letters, not ACCEPTANCE letters.] Because I really want to go to Coral Reef with Hannah, Steffy, and Tara... ='( I think they're gonna make it. Even if it is by lottery. =/

There was other stuff on my mind and I'm too blocked to think of whatever it was. T_T

Latah Gatah.

wewt!

Mon, 09 Feb 2009 22:15:20 GMT

I will now shamelessly promote my favorite latino rock band: :D

Don Tetto

http://dontetto.com/

They're AWESOME =D I heard of them first from the iTunes free Cancion de la Semana, and I'm totally in love with them. Anyone else heard of them?

I just bought their special edition CD off iTunes [Yay allowance!] and I'm gonna go get high off their epicness. :D

Poem I wrote in second period

Fri, 30 Jan 2009 18:28:37 GMT

The Hindered Heart in the Hollow

Within this hollow,
the Hindered Heart doth lie,
crying,
sobbing,
crushed to pieces for the dozenth time.

The weeping willows offer little well deserved comfort,
for they only mumble and murmur in their eternal slumber.
The Sun dares not grace this horrible hollow,
while it still lies,
beneath the maniacal moon's watchful eyes.

The vines that hang off the willows kiss the Hindered Heart's limbs,
making the King's job of rebuilding Humpty Dumpty, who fell off a wall,
simple enough that to challenge the chore would require extreme gall.
They try, try, try over and over,
to no avail does the Hindered Heart get a good once over.

Then it speaks,
"He toys with my heart,
how long 'till we are apart?
The wind will soon blow,
through this vacant hollow,
which currently serves as my soul.
My heart has now whithered to this icy block of coal,
but hopefully this feeling will soon depart,
and I'll feel better on the 'morrow."

The weeping willows weep once more,
for the Hindered Heart cannot heal its deep sore.

Within this hollow,
the Hindered Heart doth lie,
weeping beneath the cruel world's eye.

Don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know. If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go.

Fri, 30 Jan 2009 18:21:03 GMT

Got a lot on my mind right now, things that I had sort of hoped would stay with me are gone. Not necessarily a thing, more of a person. I'm really bi polar today, but I think I'm keeping my resolution quite well. The one regarding hiding my feelings and making up some damn good facades. Single again...Cried my eyes out last night. Should have expected it, right? Who in their right mind would care for me in such a way, I was a fool to fall for such fantasies.

Sun, 25 Jan 2009 01:08:55 GMT

Your rainbow is strongly shaded violet.

What is says about you: You are a creative person. You appreciate beauty and craftsmanship. You are patient and will keep trying to understand something until you've mastered it.

Find the colors of your rainbow at spacefem.com.

Fri, 23 Jan 2009 18:23:52 GMT

Boooooooooooored. 'Least Emlay's here so that oughta make things more fun. :P

Urg

Thu, 22 Jan 2009 18:38:41 GMT

Okay, so today's been alright, I guess. I've been really crabby and stressed out, and at times, I'm getting a little better at hiding it. Two New Years' resolutions to add

*Better study habits/actually START studying
*get better at hiding feelings/master neutral expression

Regarding the first, I got an F on that fucking math test, and a C on my midterm. I'm not going to let myself put up with that kind of bullshit anymore. I have to start actually trying in school and give a shit. Up till now, if I failed a test, I shrug it off, don't let it bother me and don't learn that I have to study. Not going to be the deal anymore. I have to study, try to stop copying unless under particular circumstances, put more time towards learning Italian and my piano studies. If I want to be successful, I have to try. I have to try and drill that into my pea sized brain.

Regarding the second, I'm too easy to read and it's always bothered me, but lately more than ever. I need to think through my actions and how I want to portray myself at a particular instance in time. For example, say that I'm in a shit mood, but I don't want anyone to notice, I have to really try and just put away my problems in a box somewhere in my consciousness and put on a smile, no matter how fake it may be...Melissa can read me like a book. Always has been able to. *reminiscent chuckle* Tara's pretty good at it. And so's Emily. *Sigh* Gotta fix that. I hate that I'm so easy to read...

My fingers are twitching a little...o.O trembling/twitching. Hm. Weird... O.o o.O o.o O.O 0.o o.0

Thu, 22 Jan 2009 02:04:59 GMT

bored.

Writer's Block: Regime Change

Tue, 20 Jan 2009 18:15:02 GMT

Today marks the inauguration of Barack Obama as the 44th President of the United States. Obama's campaign was built around a message of change. What changes would you most like to see in the next 4 years?

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The economy, mainly. I hope that Obama does everything in his power to get us on our feet because there's no way that the world can handle a depression...Things are bad enough as it is, people going on rampages, murder's spreading like an epidemic. More eco-friendly things. Maybe have that thing regarding recycling that if you recycle a certain product, you can get paid or something like that, and make it nationwide. Put the power in the PEOPLE'S hands, like it's SUPPOSED to be, rather than in the hands of the CORPORATIONS. EQUAL PROTECTION UNDER THE LAW. The 14th amendment was imposed for a reason, it's about time we pay it some attention and respect. People shouldn't be discriminated for being black, white, hispanic, native american, gay, straight, bi-sexual, whatever. It's about time that peace sets in. AND MAKE RIGHT AND PEACE IN THE MIDDLE EAST. WE'VE DUG OURSELVES A HOLE BY INSTIGATING THIS WAR, AND IT'S ABOUT TIME WE MAKE THINGS RIGHT. ENOUGH PEOPLE HAVE DIED, GIVEN THEIR LIVES IN MILITARY SERVITUDE, AND PROTECTED THEIR COUNTRY ON BOTH SIDES OF THE SPECTRUM. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

Sun, 18 Jan 2009 05:30:39 GMT

Okie, soooooo yesterday....I went.....With Angelo....To teh Hard Rock. Yeah. :P it pwned. BUT what was even BETTER was that I SAW BILLY JOEL IN FUCKING CONCERT :DDDDDDDD it was AMAZING. FYI I'm a HUGE BJ fan. [both ;-)] He was so amazing and the last song he sang was Piano Man, my favorite song by him, and it was all just so....Perfect. :D I was like holding Gelo's hand the whole time or he had his arm around me or something to that effect and he even put up with my crap singing. xD I'd go on, but I'd show off my hopeless romanticness. xD baibai

Writer's Block: Back to School

Thu, 15 Jan 2009 02:14:34 GMT

What fictional high school—from tv, film, or a book—would you most like to attend? Or would you rather never go near high school again, fictional or otherwise?

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FORKS HIGH SCHOOL :D

Wed, 14 Jan 2009 15:42:05 GMT

Things've been purty good lately. The whole chest shit this time I think was just 'cause of stress. Damn high school applications. >.< As far as that, the last of my applications are being submitted today...Thankfully. I'm glad to get it over with. >_< I hope I don't make it into Ferguson, I really don't wanna go...It's like a back-up school. Main choice is Coral Reef, and my secondary choice is that forensics school. It looks promising and I hope that I get in...But if it comes down to Reef and Law, I'm picking Reef. I mean, what if I abruptly change my mind about what I want to do? It's rather unlikely, but it can happen. It's happened before, so who knows? >.< Besides, IB is just epic win. In like every sense of the word. ^_-! Yush. Winking ^_^ face. :P hehe.

So, I finished Hybrid and I've given it to a few people to edit, but my "brother", Brandon, is the most annoying editor EVER. T_T I want to shoot him in the face. I...Really dont' value his opinion when it comes to writing, but I love him like a brother so I kind of have to give it to him and he's been really supporting through it all. *sigh* Whatevs. I just want to get some opinions, make some changes based on those opinions, send it off to a professional editor, get his/her opinion, work with that, then go to some publishing houses...I dunno. I guess we'll see, eh?

:/

Lovely. I just found out that I got a fucking C on my math midterm. So, this'll probably be one of my last posts for a while. Woop-d-fucking do. I'll probably get this shit over with and tell my parents sometime next week...After my two days off that so I can do whatever the fuck I want and enjoy myself. Shit. That's what I get for being somewhat confident.

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 01:32:59 GMT

Chest pains are starting to come back. Fucking dammit. They were gone for a few days and now they're back. Just fucking lovely.

Fri, 09 Jan 2009 18:04:20 GMT

Alas, here I am, sitting and doing nothing. xD I brought my jump drive so I can actually be productive today and maybe finish editing chapter 31. :o As if I will. -___-' Whatever, today's been an okay day so far. I filmed a video for mah sistah from anotha mistah, Nessa, and I'm going to try and put it up later :] Anyone that's interested, my youtube is phailureatlife ^_^ Yus. I ish massively skillleeeedddd. :P AnyVay, today's been okie 'cause I got to chillax with teh sexy bf which is always fun. I'm kinda hoping to go chill in the park after school. Alone ;) HEhehehe. ^_^ Like that's gonna happen. xD And Hannah and Fabian say that my sammiches are really good. 'Cause everyday I make a sammich and cut in it half, half for Hannah and half for mahself. =P 'cause otherwise Hannah would only eat like an ice cweam for lunch. D: So yeah. And Fabian was hungry so Hannah gave him a piece of hers and Hannah had a sam-gasm. XD Yus. WILLY CHIRINO FTW EL ES EL CUBANO MAS BUENO DEL MUNDO. That is all. ^_^ Yusyus. AnyVay, after school I'm going to try to call the high school I'm applying for for forensics so I can get some more info then write my essay and ship it off. :] ^_^ Okie Imma try to finish working on Chapter 31. Baibai :]

Thu, 08 Jan 2009 18:21:25 GMT

Today's been alright. Same old same old, I suppose. I'm in a little pain, luckily not so much, though. *Reminds self not to breathe deeply* But, I've got a bit of another conflict. My dad's trying to "reach out" to Angelo. T_T I told him to buzz off in a somewhat polite way, but I don't think that he's going to. Or he'll be a smart ass and do something But whateverr. Anyways, for the past few months I've been developing this...Fear of my dad. Not fun.

:/

Wed, 07 Jan 2009 18:24:20 GMT

Today's kinda meh. I'm in fucking pain again, god fucking damn it. Going up the fucking stairs is pure hell. T_T Not to mention having to go around in circles before lunch to get my high school shit straightened out. Still can't take a deep breath, hell in some cases I just can't take a breath. Simple as that. Bull. Shit. More shit to add to my mind. >_< Grrrr. I hate having to force a smile. =/ Things with teh bf. That's a good thing. Grr the fatass from brain bowl wasn't fucking here today so I had to sit on my ass for like ten minutes waiting up-fucking stairs when I could've been with him. Bull. Shit. Urg when I'm in pain I get really easily ticked off. T_T I hope it's not too obvious. But I have a feeling it is. Damn it. Whatever, I have shit to do. Sadly enough. I'd rather go home and lay in bed, the only time that I can actually fucking breathe. Kind of.

Wed, 07 Jan 2009 00:02:23 GMT

Spoke a bit too soon about the chest pain going away. Damn it. T_T

hai

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 18:12:56 GMT

Today hasn't been so bad, considering the heart/chest pains. I'm glad for that. I mean, it's still there, just kind of faint. Relief, much? Until it starts com-ow. T_T *smacks self* no deep breaths, intelligente. >.< De todas maneras, hehe Cubanasa ftw. ^_^ Yesterday all the way home from this little bodegita in Miller, I was reminiscing with my mom of all the memorias that I have in Hialeah. I really miss it, I mean last time I was there, it was like a major blast from the past, and somewhat depressing. :/ I'm getting older, and so are all of the people that helped raise me. Majority of them are elderly people, Maria, Hulia, and Anita. Anita's my great grandmother, and I love her more than the rest of my family, I consider her like a parent almost. She is, undoubtedly, the strogest, most amazing, incredible woman I've ever met, and I have a privelige of being related to her. It's almost an honor to be her great-granddaughter. I'm remembering how Mr. Stewart's changing around the essays and another class had to write about their heroes. If I had to pick a hero, I'd pick her in a heartbeat. But enough of my mindless blabbering. I have actual work to do and I want to start typing up the sequal to Hybrid since I don't have access to my edited chapters from home due to the unfortunate act that I lost my jump drive. T_T anyway, I should probably finish this portfolio so I don't fail the nine weeks. xD

~Ciao

Mon, 05 Jan 2009 18:43:07 GMT

I posted like ten minutes but whatever. Mood just took a major downhill slide. I was going back to the very beginning when I first started my livejournal and I realized how much things have changed. Things that I usually ignore, glares and eye rolls, now become fresh burning slices in my head. I look back at the beginning and a few particular ones that stick out to me are the ones where I mention Alicia and Sarah in a positive way. As my "friends". It makes me think, what the fuck happened? Was it always like this and I was just too blind to see it? Possibly. Plausibly. Probably. In reference to the previous question, if Sarah's reading this, which I doubt, she'd probably say something like, you happened, (insert insult of choice here). Pretty sure. Just saying. Whatever. Way for me to fuck up my day again.Wewt! D<

owowowowowowowowowowowowowwowGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR T_T

Mon, 05 Jan 2009 18:20:10 GMT

DEATH. T_T I. Can't. Move. URG. T_T I'm not going to tell my parents or anything of the sort, but I AM going to rant to no end. So, if you don't want to deal, baibai. = ] ^_^ GRRR CONNO KEEPS MAKING ME LAUGH D: X_X DEEEAATTTHHHHHHH. T_T But, on a kinda cutesy note, Angelo was kinda worried about me and it made me feel really special inside. : ] <3 I luvers him. ^_^ I'll spare whoever's actually reading the pathetic dramatics of going on and on about how much I love him, and back to the ranting. XDD AnyVay, the contractions have stopped...For the most part. T_T I haven't done anymore research on any chest shit, and I don't think I really want to. >.< AnyVay, I'm not really worried about whatever is to come, but I remember that...yesterday? No, the day before yesterday, when the contractions started, I was really really scared. I could've sworn I was having a heart attack or something. Either a heart attack or fainting or something. Which really fucking sucked.

Panic+anxiety attack+chest pain=PHAIL.

T_T but yeah. The only really good thing about today is that I'm with Angelo : ] and he always makes me feel better. :D <3 ^_^